1 Down, 3 to Go...
SPACE It was a day after my brutal match with Michael Diamond… a match that should have never taken place to begin with… but it did… and because of Eric Rayne, I may be the cause of his collapsation in the very ring we took to hell and back. How could I have been manipulated into believing I did those acts… perhaps my dreams were trying to tell me something… warning me subconsciously something wicked this way comes… but why is it only my deepest thoughts pick up on the subliminal messages and not my immediate senses…
SPACE It wasn’t a complicated riddle, I should have put the pieces together and realized exactly what was happening around me… but I was the pawn in Eric Rayne’s sick little game. If my sister hadn’t broken threw and stopped me that instant… I may have put my own brother along the others on the wall, in the Hall of Sensation. God, how blind must I have been? It still makes no sense… Why, Eric? Why? I looked up to you like a mentor… my entire career I wanted to become Eric Rayne… why would you destroy everything I had left in this world?
SPACE Again, it was my fault for not noticing sooner… a letter from the very beginning stating he was assumed to be ‘The Sensation’ himself when stepping into an HWA ring… He played our similar characteristics against not only me, but Michael… and the entire Hardcore Wrestling Association… But Why!?
SPACE Cassandra mentioned he wanted to eliminate not only Michael Diamond, but my own sister and nephew? What purpose does it serve? She claimed he wanted me all to himself, but my loyalty was with Eric Rayne… it had been since I joined the High Society before it’s death… What was going through the mind of Eric Rayne… what did he have to gain by destroying my life completely…
SPACE Perhaps now I have gained Michael’s trust… and respect once again knowing I was not responsible for anything that I was falsely accused of… Nate Hartman will continue to disbelieve me… as well as others, but I’m not asking for forgiveness or second chances… I’m just getting these inner demons out of me… and now that Eric Rayne’s finger strings have been cut from my limbs… I am free to allow myself to visit places in my heart I was not permitted to under Eric’s guidance… no more pins in me.
SPACE Michael Diamond’s quest for revenge was based on deceit… lies, and manipulation… The reasons still unknown, but as Michael lay in a hospital bed, we both share the same feelings towards each other once again.. And that alone is enough to inspire my new ways. Perhaps there is more to be done… more to let out of my mind… The nightmares still haunt me, my friends… God’s little way of punishing me until he’s ready to drop me into the Lake of Sulfur with my mother and father… it seems. However, I will take what is given to me, for I deserve the wrath of God for the wrath I have sinned endless times… there are countless times of reckoning still awaiting Danny Starr… and the monster I see in the mirror doesn’t look so scary anymore. Perhaps one day… the horns will perish from his forehead, and his teeth will dull… his eyes will glow green rather than red… but until I destroy the Satan who has buried me deep… I will always see the evil in my own eyes… as will others.
SPACE There’s no time like the present… what better time to chase after this Devil but a day after a revelation, so to speak. Crash N’ Burn marked the dawning of, probably, the best match HWA will see this year… not because it was Best friend versus best friend, not because of the utter hell we put each other threw… simply because it was the most heated, anticipated rivalry between 2 people who really weren’t rivals at all… just mislead.
SPACE That’s enough contemplating for now… however, the day was new… I had gotten a full nights sleep… not because my horrors vanished nor because my love, Jenn was in my arms… it was the pain killers forcing me into a state of rest. I woke up sore… as if I had been through an iron man competition… limping my stiff body to the kitchen where Jenn had already prepared my breakfast. Bacon and an Omelet… the love of my life was obviously trying to kill me… as if my cholesterol wasn’t high enough already… none-the-less I ate it to please her… after all, it wasn’t everyday I woke up to a beautiful woman cooking breakfast for me. It was nice and appreciated. She, however, was no where to be found… a note on the table informed me she had taken my 300 C out for a spin while I slept. That little devil… she knew I would have fought her on even stepping near that car, but I trust her.
SPACE I had no plans for the day… I had no reason to train since I was facing an old colleague of mine on Survival… Brooklyn. Former FOS member… former EWF member… former friend. Of course times change and he too was just another enemy to my list.
SPACE He too, knows my reputation as Last Man Standing, just as everyone does. Of course the HWA hypes my 2-in-a-row win, and it seems people are curious to see what rabbit I have in the hat for this year… no tricks, my friends… I have nothing to prove this time around. As of last night, I have everything I desire in life… My best friend back… contact with my sister once again… and the greatest girl anyone could ever have cooking breakfast for me.
SPACE There are burdens, however… and beings I had no scheduled activities or appointments today… I looked to my refrigerator and sighed with a stressful gasp. I had been putting this off for so long… it was time.
SPACE I stood to my feet and left the dishes in the sink just as I always did… Mark would be up soon to take care of his daily chores: My dishes. After letting the water dissolve the, now cold, eggs on my plate… I walked to the refrigerator where I saw a piece of white paper with a 10 digit number on it… There was no name, but there would be no way of forgetting why I had put it in plain sight… It was someone I felt I should call for the last 2 years but never could push myself to do it. I grabbed my cell phone and looked at the time… it was early. I sighed again, arguing with myself on whether or not to do it…
SPACE I looked at the paper the number was on, hesititating to dial it into my cell phone. I felt the soreness in my body... every muscle was worked; stretched to its maximum… even the fingers I use to press in the first 3 numbers of the man I haven't talked to since... since the dark days. I finally sighed and decided to be a man about this, finishing off the phone number and placing the speaker to my ear... gulping as the first ring sounded. It was on the second ring my heart began to pump... another ring...
SPACE Meanwhile, Sett had been seated in his house, watching television, taking his week off fairly easy.
Sett: That Last Man Standing stuff's all behind me now, I'm glad to let some of the other guys show their stuff. 'sides, I've got more important matters to deal with...
SPACE Sett's musings were cut short as his cell phone rang suddenly, Kansas's "Carry on My Wayward Son" blasting forth as his ring tone for unidentified callers. Checking his cell phone, he found a number that was unfamiliar to him, save three numbers of it.
Sett: Interesting, that's a Connecticut area code... but it's not Diamond. That leaves few options, mainly... hmm...
SPACE Overcome by curiosity, Sett finally flipped open the cell phone and put it to his ear.
Sett: Hello?
SPACE His voice appeared... I froze up... Can you blame me? What the hell am I supposed to say to the man whose life I destroyed? I retained the mind-set I set sail with, and forced myself to be a man...
Danny Starr: Ryan...
SPACE The voice, though he had slightly been expecting it, still caught him off guard. Lost in thoughts, Sett was silent for a while.
Starr? Calling me? What in hell for?!
SPACE Finally, Sett gathered up his thoughts, and spoke all that was on his mind.
Sett: Danny?
SPACE How the hell did he know it was me? It felt as if he was expecting my phone call... as if I didn't know what to say already, now I was really drawing blanks...
Danny Starr: It's been a while, Ryan...
SPACE Sett was silent for a moment, not really expecting Danny to call with just idle chitchat like this. Nonetheless, he hadn't shown any hostility thus far, and Sett wasn't about to show any himself.
Sett: That it has, Danny, that it has. I... trust things are going alright?
SPACE It was an awkward conversation, albeit expectedly so. Sett just went with what felt right, unfortunately, at the moment, nothing really fit that description.
Danny Starr: Listen, I'm not calling to make small talk... Is there a way we could meet and converse over coffee, perhaps?
SPACE An odd request, for certain, but Sett was not about to deny such an offer. Was Danny up to his old tricks? Perhaps, but even so, there wasn't much left he could really do to Sett, regrettably enough.
Sett: When did you have in mind?
Danny Starr: Preferably as soon as possible... I could fly to Austin within the next 2 hours. When would be good for you?
Sett: I'm open all day today, so you want to meet me at...
SPACE Sett is quiet for a moment, trying to decide a good place for coffee.
Sett: Kerbey Lane in 2 and a half hours? That'll give you some time to get settled, both from the time lag and this Texas heat.
SPACE Sett laughs a little and shrugs. This wasn't going too bad so far.
SPACE I couldn't help but wonder to myself if Sett was playing me just as I used to play him in the past. Was he really up for talking over coffee? Or was he just about to trick me into an unavoidable trap which I would regret? Be a man about this, Danny boy... Take what is given.
Danny Starr: 2 an a half hours is swell... Kerbey Lane is quite a land mark then?
Sett: The one I'm closest to is. Right across the street from University of Texas campus. You can't miss it. And it's quite the atmosphere, if you can deal with all the college students.
SPACE Another laugh. Sett was starting to worry himself, as easily as he was warming up to Starr.
SPACE I was becoming worried... a man who lost the love of his life at the hands of Danny Starr was warming up to him... quite easily.
Danny Starr: Then it's decided... I'll call you again when I arrive.
SPACE Sett, after seeing that he'd been almost too friendly too quickly, iced back over suddenly.
Sett: Alright then, Danny. If that is all...?
Danny Starr: For now.
SPACE I flipped up my phone, leaving him a cold ending... Not to give him the wrong impression, only so he couldn't take advantage of my new ways... I didn't want to walk into a dark room without a light switch. Although I was beginning to wonder if hanging up on the man whose girlfriend I killed was a wise move...
SPACE Sett half expected the cold ending. After all, he had given one of his own. Shrugging, set slowly closed his cell phone back to its compacted state. Checking his watch, he made sure not to make any pressing plans in the near future. He leaned back in his chair, flipping on the TV, hoping to catch a few new HWA promos, and waited.
SPACE SPACE SPACE SPACE 2 HOURS LATER
SPACE After two and a half hours had passed, Sett remembered how hellacious airport security could be, even for someone as well-known as Danny Starr. In some cases, though, especially for someone as well-known as Danny Starr. Therefore, when the phone rang, Sett picked it up quickly.
Sett: I think I see you, go ahead and come on in. I've got a table here, waiting.
SPACE I guess I’m my own worst enemy… I couldn’t help but anticipate a flame thrower being unleashed towards me as soon as I walked in through the doors behind me. I flipped the phone and placed it back on my side as I look around to make sure nobody was setting me up. Not only was I meeting with one of the worst rivals of my career... I was meeting with him in his own town... I quickly walked in as if someone was chasing me from the outside... I took a look around, smelling a fowl odor... perhaps I'm just not used to Austin's culture... Damnit Danny, you're starting already...
Danny Starr: Where are you...
SPACE I whisper to myself to hide from the millions of thoughts running through my brain... While looking around, a candle fell from a table igniting the table cloth it was on... which startled me into a high jump... most likely because of the constant worry of Ryan with a flame-thrower... It was after the embarrassing scare I saw an amused Ryan sitting at a table in the corner... leaving a chair for me... placing me back first towards the door... odd. Perhaps I’m just being too paranoid...
SPACE I walk over to the table as Ryan stands to greet me... we lock eyes for the first time in 3 years... In the locker room and halls we would see each other, but never locked eyes once... He was most likely filled with hate and I most certainly was filled with remorse. This was starting to bother me already.
SPACE As Sett's eyes met Starr's, he wasn't quite sure what he was supposed to be feeling. While hate would have been the obvious emotion, it did not come. Perhaps anger, or sadness in remembrance of what Starr had done to him would also suffice, yet these, too, were not present. The best description of what Sett felt was, in fact, confusion. After a long moment of nothing but stares, Sett finally extended his hand towards Danny, palm open, offering a handshake.
Sett: I trust you had a pleasant flight?
SPACE I looked down at his open palm, then looked back to lock eyes... confusion took over my emotional state... I aimed my hand towards his and we gripped in a tight hand-shake...
Danny Starr: It was long... However, well worth the destination....
SPACE A small, humorless grin crosses Sett's face at Starr's comment.
Sett: Well worth it, eh? If you say so, Danny. But please, sit down, I assure you, the coffee here is quite good. For a central Texas diner, at least.
SPACE Releasing the firm grip on Starr's hand, Sett took a seat, motioning for Starr to do the same.
SPACE I sit down, almost at eye level with this monster... I must have been out of my mind tempting the fates 3 years ago... He towers over me and I made it my first priority to take the only thing he cared for. How selfish...
Danny Starr: I'm quite fine for now...
SPACE It was awkward, none-the-less... I looked down, I couldn't even look in his eyes anymore... I regret showing up... I wanted to leave, wanted to get back on that plane and never make eye contact with him again... it was just too hard. He put on a show, I could sense it... but in his eyes was pain... I had nothing to say... so I continued looking down.
SPACE Seeing that the two men had finally seated themselves, a waitress came by to get their drink orders.
Waitress: Hey there, guys, what can I get ya?
SPACE Looking up at her, Sett speaks up first.
Sett: Just a coffee, two creams, two sugars for now.
Waitress: Double double, got it. And you, darlin'?
SPACE The waitress looks down at Danny Starr, awaiting his answer.
Danny Starr: Ah, yes... I'll have your finest wine...
SPACE I look up at Sett staring at me with wide eyes...
Danny Starr:... Oh, right... Double espresso please.
SPACE The waitress couldn't help but laugh, shrugging it off.
Waitress: You got it, honey, be right back with those!
SPACE As she walked off, Sett couldn't help but smirk.
Sett: Ready to hit the bottle as fast as possible, eh, Danny?
Danny Starr: If only you knew... Ryan... if only you knew.
SPACE The smirk fades into a smaller, humorless smile, Sett's form of nonverbal agreement.
Sett: If I still drank, Danny, I'd probably have already thrown back a pitcher in the time it took for you to get here.
SPACE Not wanting to waste any more time, Sett continued, getting straight to the point.
Sett: You said you weren't here for small talk. So what's going on?
SPACE I sigh... I knew it wasn't long before he would eventually drag it out of me... I had to get it over with... but how? Here goes...
Danny Starr: For three years... I’ve developed insomnia so to speak. Although its not natural, it's called by traumatic stress and the horrors in my subconscious. For 3 years... every night I try to lay down an sleep... I see your face. I see your face and I see your pain. The pain I caused you... every night it's the same nightmares... the same cold sweats; the same innocent girl... just... lying there...
SPACE I couldn't grasp my control anymore... tears flowed down my cheek as I quickly covered my face with both hands trying to hide my weakness from the man facing me. I sobbed and wiped the tears and snot from my face trying to continue... but the words were blocked by more tears... it was uncontrollable... and I was more humiliated than ever before.
SPACE Upon hearing the man break into tears, many of the other patrons of the diner turned in their seats to see what was going on. They were quickly driven back to their original partners and conversations, however, by a sweeping glare from the big man across the table from Danny. Once everyone had begun to mind their own business once more, Sett looked at Danny, asking a question that came out a lot more accusatory than he had originally intended it to.
Sett: Is that so? Forgive me, Danny, but how am I supposed to believe something quite like that? It seems rather... far-fetched.
Danny Starr: My reason for being here isn't to gain your respect... or forgiveness... It was something in the past that I regret doing and ever since doing it... Her memory has haunted my every day lifestyle... and there is nothing I can do to change that... even this meeting will not rid her from my nightmares... and you don't have to forgive me, Ryan... this is just something I needed to do for myself...
SPACE I didn't expect him to forgive me... nor was I expecting a response.
Danny Starr: That's all I came here for... I didn't want to do it over a phone... and I most certainly didn't want to do this in public... can't you see my reputation is the last thing I care about to expose myself like this?
SPACE I looked once more into Ryan's eyes before wiping the last tear from my eye.
Danny Starr: I said what I had to say...
SPACE I reached into my pocket and pulled out a crisp green slip of paper with Andrew Jackson posing in the center... placing it directly on the table.
Danny Starr: Thank you for your time, Ry.
SPACE I slid from out of my chair and stood to my feet, putting my head down to avoid showing my face as I began to turn towards the door.
SPACE Extending his hand, Sett called out to Danny.
Sett: Danny... wait... please.
SPACE I stopped dead in my tracks… there was no way he was going to forgive me… I saw his eyes when I brought up Heather… there was nothing in this world that would cease his hostility. I turned around to him… once again locking eyes… awaiting his plea.
SPACE Letting out a very audible sigh, Sett resigned himself to what he was about to say.
Sett: Just... have a seat, man. Look, a lot has happened since... since that day.
SPACE I sit back down in my seat as Ryan requested... letting out a sniffle from my nose, god how embarrassing that was.
Danny Starr: It doesn't change the fact that it happened to begin with, Ryan... If I could take it back... (Sigh)... I would give my life to go back...
SPACE Sett shook his head, shrugging apologetically.
Sett: That's the rub, though, ain't it? You can't. What's happened, happened. And y'know, Danny... as much as I hate to say it... things happen for a reason, I suppose.
SPACE Another humorless smile crossed his face as Sett awaited Danny's reaction to what he had just said.
Danny Starr: What reason would that be, Ryan? Selfishness... greed? arrogance... there's no master plan... As much as I’d like to believe my actions are controlled by somebody else... it was the devil in my mind that day, Ryan... and there is no justifiable reason for the actions I conducted...
Sett: Yeah, but, look at it this way, Danny. What you did, after that initial moment of impact, was painless. And, as macabre as it may seem, the things that happened in my life after that would have been even worse if she had been around.
SPACE Leaning in close, Sett spoke a bit about things that shouldn't really be spoken in public.
Sett: Just think about what the Black Skulls would have done to her, had they gotten their hands on her before you did. Not only would that have been worse to her... it would have been thoroughly and absolutely my fault. I couldn't have ever held it on my conscience, had she been... well... tortured, raped, or otherwise by those bloodthirsty bastards. They did prove that they were not above taking loved ones, after all, they did manage to kidnap both Denise and Erin Wallace. So, perhaps, Danny... you might have done her a very sick and twisted favor.
SPACE Sett shook his head. While his statements were quite factual, there was something odd about actually saying them. Shrugging it off, Sett leaned back again.
Danny Starr: Okay, I'll bite... so that's your way of handling loss? coming up with a 'what if' scenario... well, Ryan... What if I never killed Heather... what would have happened to me? You think I was supposed to kill her? and if so... why me?
Sett: Well, I can assure you this isn't my idea of the 'best-case scenario.' Either way, had you never killed Heather, she probably would have been subjected to the horrors that Denise and Erin had to face. Whether you were 'supposed' to kill her or not really isn't up to me to decide, and as for why you, well... I suppose you really should be asking yourself that question, eh Danny?
SPACE Sett's words carried very little malice, but almost a philosophical tone to them, especially in the delivery of his last point.
Danny Starr: I ask myself every day... I know I changed... Nobody else believes it... Nate Hartman makes it a point to expose my true colors... I guess all there's to do now is right my wrongs... but I don't know where to start, Ryan...
SPACE The same humorless grin again spreads across Sett's lips.
Sett: I suppose, if you felt it truth, you could start with "I'm sorry," and we can see where it goes from there.
Danny Starr: Words are tools... nothing more. Anyone can say 'I'm sorry' there has to be another way to prove my empathy... anything, Ryan... I will make it up to you the best way I possibly can but for starters... I'm sorry.
Sett: Sometimes, Danny, words are all we have. At the present moment, Danny, there is really nothing you could do for me that I don't already have. Simply knowing that you are sorry for your actions is enough for me. The look in your eyes prove it, you know. A man's eyes can't lie, no matter how hard he tries to make them. Anyone who can truly see will see that. Trust me, I've made a living out of knowing when people are lying or not.
SPACE
SPACE Shrugging, Sett continued.
Sett: Danny, Heather wasn't the only thing that I'd lost. Not long afterward, I lost a brother as well. Brad died so that I could live. I carry that with me to this day. It made me realize that nothing is forever, and, especially in the kind of things I am caught up in, your life could be over at any moment. If I continued to be hung up over Heather, what kind of life would I lead? I'll tell you, a short one: If my enemies found out that I'm constantly preoccupied, they would ensure my demise. In truth, Danny, I killed my grief over Heather back at the Black Skull base... quite literally, in fact.
SPACE Sett thought back to the Black Skull headquarters, where one of the shape shifting Ghosts posed as Heather to serve as a distraction to Sett. However, one long, last embrace and a knife in the back had finally laid that memory to rest, permanently.
Danny Starr: So what now, Ryan?
Sett: What now? Well... I reckon that the best thing we can do is shake hands, put all these ghosts from the pasts to rest, finally, and go on about our lives. Hartman might still have his doubts, Danny, but as far as I'm concerned, you've got an alright head on your shoulders. And a good heart in your chest. People do change, Danny, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worst...
SPACE Sett trailed off, his mind suddenly on Damien Michaels and the splitting headache he had caused him at Crash-n-Burn.
Danny Starr: Speaking of that... What was up with your encounter at Crash N' Burn?
Sett: I wish I knew, Danny. Damien seems to not be himself these days. For starters, he's acting under Jackson, which you and I can both attest to as being a complete jackass. Secondly, he's not rebelling against this. You remember the days when Tha Aftermath and the Foundation of Sensation would go toe-to-toe, wouldn't you agree that just laying over and taking isn't his style? And finally... he DDT'd me! What kind of guy DDT's his best friend?
Danny Starr: Well, I would say your good friend, and my old friend Michael... but it seems sometimes people you think changed... are just being mislead... But you know the one thing that I still haven't figured out, Ryan?
SPACE Sett raises an eyebrow and asks the obvious question.
Sett: What's that?
Danny Starr: I can't figure out why you would invite me to a 'Better' coffee house in all of center Texas, yet I still haven't received a damn coffee yet!
SPACE I begin chuckling along with Sett... first time for everything it seems.
SPACE Sett laughs alongside Danny, supposing that there is, indeed, a first time for everything.
Sett: I reckon they saw how much of a force the two guys at this table are to be reckoned with, and decided to make us the best damn coffee they could possibly afford.
SPACE Almost as if on cue, the waitress comes back with the coffees, placing each one in front of it's respective owner.
Waitress: You boys want anything to eat with that, or will that be all?
Sett: No thanks, not for me, anyway. Danny?
Danny Starr: No, thank you, I have to be somewhere tomorrow...
SPACE Danny begins laughing and places his hand on the waitress shoulder to indicate he's only joking. She joins in with him, not understanding his joke...
Danny Starr: I'm done... This coffee is plenty. Thank you very much.
SPACE The waitress smiles as she goes back to print out the check. I looked back at Ryan… feeling more comfortable after talking to him… hoping he had felt more comfortable as well… I know damn well I wouldn’t if I were in his shoes, but he’s a lot different than me… a hell of a lot different. For the first time, I could honestly say I felt a sense of strong respect for Ryan…
Danny Starr: It was good seeing you again, Ryan…
Sett: Same here, Danny… and I mean it… don’t put yourself down about this anymore… what’s in the past is in the past…
Danny Starr: If you ever need anything… you have my number.
Sett: With all due respect, Danny… The only thing you might be able to do for me is get me into a country club… other than that, I’ll hold my own…
Danny Starr: Of course… but you know what I mean.
Sett: You too, Danny… Thank you…
SPACE I smiled… not the typical evil smile everyone is so used to seeing, but instead… a friendly smile… for I have found a friend in an enemy so deep. If Michael and Ryan could see the true me… why can’t the rest of the world?
Sett: Now go win Last Man Standing… again.
Danny Starr: I’ll dedicate this match with Brooklyn to you… for the sake of Tha Aftermath’s golden days…
SPACE We both tapped our coffee mugs together, Ryan a little too roughly causing the coffee to shoot out of my mug and stain my 500 dollar over-shirt. I looked down at the warm liquid dripping off my collar… and looked up at Ryan.
Sett: Oops…
SPACE And began laughing.
Danny Starr: Don’t worry about it… It’s old anyway.
SPACE It wasn’t old… I had just gotten it last week, but I now look past the minor problems in life… the unimportant factors that cause unnecessary stress. This was a new dawn for me… and my heart goes out to Brooklyn in our first round contest. If any hostility is still had with him, I come bearing no anger… no hate. Only respect and a goal to win the Last Man Standing fair.
SPACE We chatted for a short time longer before departing and going our separate ways… When I came into that coffee shop… I felt unsure and worried about the outcome… walking out, I feel as if I have done some good in the name of justice… going into a fight knowing I’m going to lose… only to show to my dearest of enemies I am ready to take what I have earned… good or bad. Pleasure or pain… Love or hate. The next step was someone I don’t expect to even see me face to face… but I will make the attempt.
